Symantec will save us all… “…proactive protection against unknown and zero-day threats”
I do enjoy reading some of the stuff I get from Symantec. Today, they again announced to me that they have the security problem thing under control if I buy their stuff.
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Dear Drazen,
Did you know it’s so easy for hackers to make money off your business, it’s criminal? Or that your existing security products will probably offer zero protection against zero day threats?
If you’ve not read the Endpoint Security Journal, right now is a good time. Get the whole bare truth on endpoint security today, and make sure your business never gets caught with its pants down.
Visit us here.
Regards,
Symantec Corporation
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In addition to giving me “…proactive protection against unknown and zero-day threats”, if I don’t have this product I am told, criminals stand to make millions from the theft of corporate information. (From the link in the email sent to me – announced on the Symantec website).
Okay Symantec, I will buy your product if you can guarantee your claims. Lets see what I get in response to an email I just sent.
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To: <corpsalesasiapac@symantec.com>
Conversation: Endpoint Protection
Subject: Endpoint Protection
Dear Sir/Madam,
I received your email this morning about Symantec Endpoint Protection and links that describe the product capabilities.
Can you confirm that this product will protect me against “unknown and zero-day threats” and will stop cyber-criminals stealing my corporate information and selling it for profit as you state on the website?
If you can confirm and guarantee this, I will purchase a corporate licence.
Regards
DD
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Feels like a Friday. 
February 27th, 2008 at 2:33 pm
Hey there Mr Cynical, never look a silver bullet in the face !
February 27th, 2008 at 10:53 pm
Thanks Dec….I know I am a cynical prick but gees, I do get some ammo to work with as you know …..
BUT, unlike most conspiracy theorists, I now am close…well now confirmed to the holy grail of security…..it is the Symantec Endpoint product!!! One more email…! See below…one more response…and only because I am so insecure…..
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From: Drazen Drazic
Date: Wed, 27 Feb 2008 19:57:21 +1100
To: XXXXXX
Conversation: Endpoint Protection
Subject: Re: Endpoint Protection
Hi XXXXXX,
Just to confirm, the product will protect me against all unknown and zero-day threats? I need nothing else and if I deploy this, I will be safe and you guarantee that?
DD
On 27/2/08 3:05 PM, “XXXXXX_XXXXXXXXX”
wrote:XXXXXX XXXXXXXX
Hi Drazin
I can confirm this statement is correct.
Kind regards
XXXXXXX XXXXXXX
Pacific Inside Sales
Symantec Corporation
http://www.symantec.com
—————————————————–
Office: +61 2 8817-XXXX
Fax: +61 2 8879-1001
Email: XXX_XXXXXX@symantec.com
—————————————————–
From: Pacific Renewals
Sent: Wednesday, 27 February 2008 12:35 PM
To: XXXXX XXXXXX
Cc: Drazen Drazic
Subject: RE: Endpoint Protection
Hi XXXXXX,
Can you please assist Drazen with his query below—I believe he is looking to purchase a new license?
Thanks
Regards
XXXXX XXXXXX
Renewals Operations – Pacific
Symantec Corporation
http://www.symantec.com
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Office: 61 3 8866 XXXX
Fax: 61 3 8866 8001
Email: XXXXX_XXXXXX@symantec.com
PLEASE NOTE: The Renewals Team email address has now changed to pacific.renewals@symantec.com as these are currently being retired.
Please start using this moving forward for all queries.
Please refrain from using aus.renewals@veritas.com and corpsalesasiapac@symantec.com
?
From: Drazen Drazic [mailto:Drazen.Drazic@securusglobal.com]
Sent: Wednesday, 27 February 2008 11:39 AM
To: Pacific Renewals
Subject: Endpoint Protection
Dear Sir/Madam,
I received your email this morning about Symantec Endpoint Protection and links that describe the product capabilities.
Can you confirm that this product will protect me against “unknown and zero-day threats” and will stop cyber-criminals stealing my corporate information and selling it for profit as you state on the website?
If you can confirm and guarantee this, I will purchase a corporate licence.
Regards
DD
February 27th, 2008 at 11:29 pm
As it looks, we are all out of a job us security people based upon what Symantec has released. We now need to align ourselves close to this vendor to feed the kids…… DD is onto something here, so for our own livelihood, we must now support the SYMANTEC!!
February 27th, 2008 at 11:39 pm
@Dec..are you joking? I assume you are?
February 28th, 2008 at 8:14 am
I believe Dec is.
February 28th, 2008 at 8:33 am
Okay…I have the re-confirmation now from Symantec that this is THE solution to solve the IT security problem. As SFB says, we are now potentially out of business!
—————————–
From: XXXX XXXXXXXX
Date: Wed, 27 Feb 2008 15:21:56 -0700
To: Drazen Drazic
Conversation: Endpoint Protection
Subject: RE: Endpoint Protection
Hi Drazen
This is one of the value statements of our product which we standby but I cannot personally guarantee that anything will not happen.
If you configure and install the product correctly, then we will stand by this statement.
Kind regards
XXXXX XXXXXXXX
Pacific Inside Sales
Symantec Corporation
http://www.symantec.com
—————————————————–
Office: +61 2 8817-XXXX
Fax: +61 2 8879-1001
Email: XXXXX_XXXXXXXX@symantec.com
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February 28th, 2008 at 8:59 am
Incredible.
Whats quite amazing is the potential risk exposure to future litigation this written advice actually poses to Symantec.
Whats also amazing, given the bold claims, is that Symantec is a global enterprise, not a dodgy used car dealership on Parra Rd, Sydney.
Its living proof of Ostrich Risk Management in action.
The response to ‘Drazin’ (nice spelling) was purportedly by one of their sales team, who took it upon themselves to make this rather bold statement, simply in order to seal the deal. (No need to pass on the email to their techs/legals for clarification advice, apparently.)
But the response is a really fantastic piece of documentary evidence – should you ever require it – for the time you actually do get hacked, 0-dayed, or whatever.
Imagine presenting that actual email to a court as part of your multi million dollar losses damages claim against Symantec.
Symantec might have some explaining to do !
February 28th, 2008 at 9:14 am
@1welldone
Yes I was joking.. mostly.
I have been thinking about this a lot. I regularly complain that there isn’t enough true innovation in our industry, that it is just the same stuff over and over etc etc. But in the same breath I ridicule any big statements of vendors like this..
So of course the only option is for symantec to release it with full documentation and source for the world to test
and be held accountable if (when 
they are proven to be false.
February 28th, 2008 at 9:25 am
Everyone knows that Nortons A/V is a virus in itself.
Everyone knows that contracting a virus gives us immunity to other viruses.
Thats how it works, people !
February 28th, 2008 at 9:46 am
@SoGB
and everyone knows that hax0rs are the best security guys, so once your box is kit’ed they will look after it an make sure no one else kits it ! perfect security – and if you pay your ransome money on time you’ll have nothing to worry about !
February 28th, 2008 at 10:29 am
Subject: Endpoint Protection
From: galoot@supernerd.com.au
Date: Thu, February 28, 2008 11:26 am
To: corpsalesasiapac@symantec.com
Dear Sir/Madam,
I’ve been very reliably informed your Symantec Endpoint Protection product will protect me against “unknown and zero-day threats”.
I must say, I’m fascinated in any product that is able to protect against the unknown.
If something is unknown, it is in the present tense, not currently known.
Therefore, in order to protect against the currently unknown, you have the ability to see things occurring in the future.
That is a truly amazing and remarkable feat.
How do you do it ? Worm holes ? Re-alignment of the space/time continuum ? Bending time against itself via gravity, perhaps ?
I do hope you share your findings with the wider scientific and IT community, as this has the ability to completely re-shape our world.
Through your discovery, mankind will now have the ability to prevent poverty, global warming, even world wars. The possibilities of your discovery are truly limitless.
Congratulations Symantec,
Big Galoot.
PS. As a very small favour, what are this weekends’ Lotto numbers ?
February 28th, 2008 at 2:56 pm
I see the problem here. For all Symantec products to work effectively they need to be powered up to 1.21 Jigawatts – problem is that they are so far ahead of our known time, everything we use is based on 24 volts. Therefore we are the laggards.
I believe their new head of research, Doctor Emmett Brown, is working on a solution to bring us laymen up to speed.
Problem is the only way to get a PC up to the necessary 88 mph necessary to take advantage of the new fangled power standard is by dropping it out of a window.
I have tested this myself. I loaded my PC with Symantec gear and dropped it from the highest building I could find and you know what, they were right all along.
The resulting heap of silicon is now 100 per cent protected from everything.
February 28th, 2008 at 4:25 pm
BG, I would take those claims and subsequent clarifications as something that would have some weight in court though I would assume somewhere in the software license agreement that any liability is not accepted. Would that negate the advertised claims and those clarified and confirmed here by email? That would be interesting to see.
emcee, LOL – that was funny!
February 28th, 2008 at 11:19 pm
ok so its not perfect
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2008/02/20/symantec_enpoint_security_error_bug/
February 29th, 2008 at 9:17 am
Draz,
my two bob’s worth – I wouldn’t give you two bob’s for most disclaimers. Especially those that claim to immunise themselves from their own negligence.
A classic, simplistic example is the case of people who erect warning signs on their front gate – “Warning – savage dog”.
The warning sign is an admission by the occupier of the premises to the effect that they keep a savage dog. By implication, visitors run the risk of being bitten/savaged.
The “disclaimer” of knowingly keeping the savage dog therefore can actually act in reverse – resulting in the real potential for litigation should someone be subsequently be bitten.
The point is, disclaimers do not automatically immune oneself to future litigation.
But it can also become a very complex, and highly lucrative area of law. And something best left to the lawyers.
BG.
February 29th, 2008 at 11:16 am
“Therefore, in order to protect against the currently unknown, you have the ability to see things occurring in the future.”
Brilliant, B.G.
Along with this remarkable feat, the Symantec PRs deserve acknowledgment for their unwavering ability to ring me 10 times a day about an exclusive interview with the leading managerial-directing, security-guru-master-protecting, zero-day-detecting front-line visionary of Symatec US (AKA head of sales).
They persist even though the phone conversations are one-way and quite repetitive – I haven’t changed by monotone answering machine message in a year or so.
Icing on the cake? The only Symantec story I bothered to cover was when they sent China into a blue screen of death.
Maybe their efforts could bear fruit if it was possible to talk security for security’s sake, rather than their ability to warp time and space.
February 29th, 2008 at 11:07 pm
It is great to hear another journo taking the position you have. It gives us all hope that stronger questioning of silver bullet solutions in the press will start to become more frequent.
Now to all, in case I sound like a whinglng old bugger, let me clarify; the positions I take on things like this are not against helpful solutions but rather questionable marketing and approaches to the industry by some. Selling on fear and questionable capabilities is just wrong….. It is so 90s.
I know if buy a dedorant, I’m not going to have hot sexy babes salivating in front of me while screaming some tribal chant, but if BMW or Mercedes says that if I buy their cars, I will be invincible or to death, I am going to question that advertising and so will others. Yet in our industry, few question the advertising of the latest silver bullets.
DD
March 1st, 2008 at 3:46 am
Come on guys… don’t mock Symantec.. I’m sure this is definately the silver bullet we’ve all been waiting for (I mean it’s only been what 20+ years)
So I just pay once and saves me for life… oh no sorry annual subscription — I always wondered how Symantec became a leading Internet Security (acquisition) company. I guess they had to get there dollars from somewhere!
Funny that people keeping paying for their protection year after year.. only to find out that they were only a day away from the signature update that would have saved them.. Oh well i guess now they have a 0day endpoint security product they’ll all be saved..
Personally if you are going to run Windows.. I’ve got a better end-point security device.. I’ll guarentee 100% 0-day detection.. all for one off cost of $1.46
See: http://www.amazon.com/KleenCut-Stainless-Scissors-Purple-ACM41705/dp/B0006VRMCM
My silver bullet comes in an aluminium casing.. oh i see Symantec has version for it as well.. I think i’ll save my cash and take the risk
March 7th, 2008 at 11:25 am
heh, hacker safe being not so safe:
http://0×000000.com/index.php?i=526
March 28th, 2008 at 12:36 pm
Thanks Drazen!
You made my day lighter!
Ask Symantec to give it in writing as Auscert
Stas.
April 15th, 2008 at 7:23 am
Symantec sales called me yesterday and left a message on my voicemail to contact them if I was interested in pursuing.
That’s probably the end of this story. Maybe not….
@Stas…maybe the Auscert thing is a good idea.
April 15th, 2008 at 6:56 pm
ask for the guarantee-zero-day-free thing in writing, then we can stick it on a wall something. gzdf. has a nice ring to it.
April 15th, 2008 at 7:25 pm
@Silky…I would take their responses here as their guarantee! (I’ve kept the emails). Post away dude!
April 15th, 2008 at 8:13 pm
[...] Maybe I should be nicer and say Security People vs. Security Vendor Sales guys. Two different worlds as we’ve talked about before and as we had a laugh about here with the Symantec Guarantee. [...]
April 30th, 2008 at 10:54 am
[...] Everyone as we know should be using Symantec. They have the guarantee against “unknown and zero-day threats” as documented here. [...]
May 21st, 2008 at 12:09 am
[...] thinking…thought bubble here: “Hang on,…haven’t Symantec killed off everyone? Hang on….aren’t we all irrelevant [...]
May 25th, 2008 at 4:30 pm
[...] then again, we have the old Symantec Guarantee. Posted here again for your viewing pleasure and evidence requirements for any legal action you may [...]
July 29th, 2008 at 11:03 am
[...] BorB: The almost zero liability that sits with software vendors at present doesn’t encourage change on their part to develop better software. You talk about potential legal avenues in your book that could be pursued and may sometime down the track be used to assist with change. How about targeting false and misleading advertising as another avenue to drive change and allow the consumer to dispute the validity of the software agreement and thus throwing some liability back at the developer? (eg; many developers of “security” software make extraordinary claims about their products that we all know are false and misleading. I believe they’ve never, at least in Australia gotten into trouble because no one has reported them). Eg; the old classic in Beast of Buddha; “The Symantec Guarantee”: http://beastorbuddha.com/2008/02/27/symantec-will-save-us-allproactive-protection-against-unknown-an... [...]